Say What?!
Someone I consider a friend wrote this to me in an email this morning:
"Sometimes doors close for a reason.
We have to live through the questions of life."
I am chewing on it.
I think I need to start taking up the discipline of daily blogging again. There is so much going on in my life, head and heart. It is seems too easy to just not pay attention to it all. I just want to keep my head down and plow without reflecting.
Recently I was separated from my position at Saint Francis United Methodist Church. (aside: Isn't that word "separated" just as sterile as one can get?) and a good friend told me I MUST take time to reflect; I MUST NOT jump right into trying to find another job and the "what next" of life or it would cripple me.
I have tried to do both so far I guess with not enough attention to the reflection part. One of the students from SFUMY recently taught (or re-taught) me an important lesson. Evan said he doesn't connect with God through reading or studying the Bible. He does through doing though - through serving (I explained to Evan that he still needed to be in the Word and to develop the disciplines of reading and studying). We don't all connect with God in the same ways. Even more to the point, we often connect with Him in different ways in different times in our lives. I am reminded of Evans lesson, which I need to thank him for, today because I was thinking this morning that I "reflect", sort through feelings and ideas, and gather my "take-aways" mostly through conversation with others. Most of the time I am able to get there through writing also.
In that, and this is not a pity trip, I do not have any friends locally to really talk deeply with, I think I shall commit to the blog. I will have to find a way to make sure only some people can read them though so I do not hurt or further confuse my students and others at SFUMC who do not need anymore confusion or hurt.
"We have to live through the questions of life." I am hearing that 2 ways. One, we just have to endure through them and secondly, we GET to REALLY live through the questions of life. It is in the time of crisis when the fog is the thickest that we are the most alive. How can I embrace such an idea when it is coming full force against the thoughts and feelings I have?
Take every thought captive... So much discipline is required when I feel the weakest. When I am weak... The Word of God won't seem to leave me alone in such wandering wonderings. I almost resent it at times. "Just leave me alone! I know! I know, but that is not how I want to feel right now; not what I want to follow!"
Say What?! Be still and know...
"Sometimes doors close for a reason.
We have to live through the questions of life."
I am chewing on it.
I think I need to start taking up the discipline of daily blogging again. There is so much going on in my life, head and heart. It is seems too easy to just not pay attention to it all. I just want to keep my head down and plow without reflecting.
Recently I was separated from my position at Saint Francis United Methodist Church. (aside: Isn't that word "separated" just as sterile as one can get?) and a good friend told me I MUST take time to reflect; I MUST NOT jump right into trying to find another job and the "what next" of life or it would cripple me.
I have tried to do both so far I guess with not enough attention to the reflection part. One of the students from SFUMY recently taught (or re-taught) me an important lesson. Evan said he doesn't connect with God through reading or studying the Bible. He does through doing though - through serving (I explained to Evan that he still needed to be in the Word and to develop the disciplines of reading and studying). We don't all connect with God in the same ways. Even more to the point, we often connect with Him in different ways in different times in our lives. I am reminded of Evans lesson, which I need to thank him for, today because I was thinking this morning that I "reflect", sort through feelings and ideas, and gather my "take-aways" mostly through conversation with others. Most of the time I am able to get there through writing also.
In that, and this is not a pity trip, I do not have any friends locally to really talk deeply with, I think I shall commit to the blog. I will have to find a way to make sure only some people can read them though so I do not hurt or further confuse my students and others at SFUMC who do not need anymore confusion or hurt.
"We have to live through the questions of life." I am hearing that 2 ways. One, we just have to endure through them and secondly, we GET to REALLY live through the questions of life. It is in the time of crisis when the fog is the thickest that we are the most alive. How can I embrace such an idea when it is coming full force against the thoughts and feelings I have?
Take every thought captive... So much discipline is required when I feel the weakest. When I am weak... The Word of God won't seem to leave me alone in such wandering wonderings. I almost resent it at times. "Just leave me alone! I know! I know, but that is not how I want to feel right now; not what I want to follow!"
Say What?! Be still and know...
posted by murph411 | 9:12 AM
2 Comments:
If you switch over to the new blogger (the google one) you can set a security level on your blog which will allow you to only allow certain people to read it. It's a pretty cool feature similar to Xanga's friend lock feature. Check it out.
quite frankly, screw being sensitive to everyone...where has it gotten you? I think that the people in lovely St. Francis church need to see through the facade of their leaders. Sorry dude, but you cannot always turn the other cheek. Get out there and kick some butt, post the truth. Stop trying to protect everyone at the sacrifice of yourself. Free your mind, and the rest will follow.
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